Well well well.. Look who decided to finally do a POST

Sunday, October 17, 2010

So guess who decided to finally make good on her promise to update this blog.. Yeah yeah I know.. ME.. and this time do I plan on making it a continuous habit.. all I can say is I will try... (yes I did just have a conversation with myself) soo here is what I was thinking which led me to write this here blog... Have you ever had a moment where life runs away from you and you don't know when things have changed? This is what is currently happening to me. I don't know when it happened but I am not able to focus and get things done like I used to. I was planning on coming back to blogging months ago, but then I always found an excuse not to write, or was always doing something that took me away from writing and I finally have so many things to say, and write about that I don't know where to begin.. From school to work to dating.. there have been so many different changes both good and bad, but I guess I'll just give a synopsis of everything and hope to make good on my "I'm gonna post regularly" promise

SO here goes...

I guess I will update about whats going on with school both teaching and attending..
I love the school where I teach. The kids are great (well some not all) and so are my colleagues. I must say that I have been blessed to work with some great ppl. They have helped me to become a better teacher (especially since last year I felt like I was thrown under the bus, but that's another post for another time cause that shit right there pissed me the hell off.!).. I can't ask for a better crowd of ppl. As far as administration goes.. um.. I can't really say that I like them that much, but I can understand the constant worry about school funding, but the shafting of the teachers to put yourself ahead.. that shit is not something I will ever be comfortable with and I don't understand it but it is what it is.. I guess when you're given such a high powered job and you're not really sure what to do the best thing is to make it seem like its not your fault.... but I digress... what I think about administration is that they should always put the students first.. nothing should be done at the expense of the teachers and at the expense of the students but again that's a whole other blog post.

As far as where I am attending school.. I can't complain. I am enjoying my program and I am hoping to be done within the next year. I have some decisions to make regarding certification but that will be done soon enough I hope.

So here is where things get a little bit effed up.. what else would I be talking about other than my LOVE LIFE or lack there of.. this is where things aren't as peachy or as simple as the work life.

I have been dating but its not with ppl that I have a genuine interest in.. Ok, wait that's not exactly true.. I have been dating ppl and they have gone fairly ok, but its not like I would hope it would be. There are some ppl that I am genuinely interested in and I am hoping that something come out of it, but what I find is that I'm continually getting involved with these emotionally unavailable men.

I don't know what is up with some of the men these days but they aren't as secure or resilient as they used to be. I'm always hearing the same things so much that I'm starting to wonder if this is part of a new code that men have devise to keep themselves single for as long as possible.

I have been hearing the "I'm SCARED" bit all summer.. Its getting really old!

We've gone on a couple dates, talked laughed, kee-kee'd it up.. and then comes the bomb heard around the world... I like you but "I'm SCARED!" WTF dude.. SERIOUSLY!!!!

I'm at the point where I just wanna say F&*K this  ISH and be done with it and be by myself. Now though it seems like a great idea I don't think I would actually go through with it because I do enjoy the male species and their company but the constant removal or admittance that they've been hurt has put me into a bind to where I wonder if this is even worth it.. But then I don't to come across like I'm jaded and bitter... so I keep an open mind

There is so much more to write but if I did then this post would be too long, so I'm going to end it here and hope that I can come back and continually write.

I've missed my blogger peeps.. I haven't done any reading like I used to and the writing well that's not like it used to be either.. I think I have to pen this portion of my day in.. or make a couple of days BLOG days..

But anywho.. I'll be around more often than the last time and make a conscious effort to actually update and post like I used to....

1 comment:

shOrtyx1 said...

just stumbled upon your blog :)
fun read

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